Have A Bite!
by keitanaka
Summary: Konoha and Hibiya is just having a casual day, playing games. Then Konoha's hunger took over... KonoHibi fluff and Random References. Oneshot. Birthday ff for Sal-san :D (Still trying hard to write a good humour *Cries and flees*


"**GAME OVER**" a robotic middle-aged man's voice said dramatically.

The only two male in the room looked blankly into the dim screen with a dramatic and bold typography in the middle of the screen. Sadly sitting on the floor, because the wires for the console they're playing is far too short, so short that it doesn't reach to the sofa.

The brunet had a temptation to press 'QUIT', but he respect his tall friend's choice. Because for some reason, they only have 2 or more players games. So really he didn't have the choice.

"Konoha. Continue?" The brunet asked in the most demanding way possible _(princess Hibiya :D)_, at the same time he fiddles with the arrow buttons to entertain himself a little bit.

"Do you want to, Hibiya?" The 'giant' answered with a question, in the most emotionless way you could ever imagine.

"... I'm asking you here..."

"I don't really mind."

Hibiya looked at Konoha, dead in the eyes, a little unimpressed. But really, Hibiya do think that it's a good trait of him - yes he does, because he could finally boss Konoha around, without Hiyori being too possessive and protective about her beloved... Konoha.

The thought of Hiyori made Hibiya a bit uncomfortable. It must be because he's still affectionate about her. That must be it. No other reasons.

Nope. He doesn't secretly have a crush on Konoha.

Totally not it.

Now before Hibiya gets mad about the author. Hibiya pressed continue, though not long later they got "**GAME OVER**"ed again.

This is why Hibiya dislike those 8-bit or what you call "Classic Retro" games. Not only that the graphics are rubbish, but they also have limited moves and less bugs (that's usually a good thing, but not to Hibiya, who always rely to lucky lags and such).

This made Hibiya a bit angry. So he quit the game and threw the controller onto Konoha, quite roughly. And did a lazy stance, of leaning forward towards the console to change the disc (or whatever you call those old game card thingies).

While Hibiya was looking through the game piles they have, Konoha's stomach started grumbling, he can't help but feel hungry since he has a routine of eating every 2 hours averagely, and it has been at least 3 hours since he had last eaten already.

Then right in front of him, he saw Hibiya's butt, which is quite small and very cute indeed.

And his brown shorts definitely reminded him of negima.

**"Wah!"** Hibiya's body drops on the floor as someone pulled his legs. He stared at Konoha, who was eyeing on his butt. In this awkward situation, Hibiya only stuttered out "... Err... Konoha?" Hoping that his alter ego wouldn't come out and try to befriend the group again after killing them thousands of time - because the last time he did that he tried to kill everyone again. *_Exaggerated inhale*_

_Man that was a long sentence! *is proud*_

Anyways...

While Hibiya frightfully stares at Konoha with teary eyes, Konoha pulled Hibiya's cute butt for a hug. This made the shota princess embarrassed and flustered, as he tries to pry open Konoha's superhumanly strong arms.

Who would've thought that Konoha saw a massive negima instead of a bum?

Konoha's hunger decided to take action not long later! By taking a massive bite of Hibi- I mean "the massive negima".

Hibiya who was too busy trying to escape was shocked by 'ze action', _and screamed so loudly you could probably hear it in space! (The author is half asleep right now, bear with me!)_

His scream was loud enough to wake Konoha from his illusions, though. Konoha just can't believe what he did to such a cute bum! You could practically see a massive bite mark on his shorts! Out of curiosity, he decided to pull the shorts down a little to see if there's a mark on-

"Konoha! What are you doing?!" Hibiya scolded at the giant, still flustered about his butt being bitten by this innocent and starving giant.

Though Konoha didn't really give much of a reaction, in fact, he only replied, "checking if your butt have a bite mark on it-"

"Of course there is! Did you know how hard you bit me?!"

Konoha kept his arms to himself and stared down to the floor, with a barely noticeable sad-face and on the verge of tears. "Sorry, Hibiya..."

Hibiya did feel bad, he didn't mean to upset his friend with his princess attitude. Just when he was **actually **going to apologize, he was interrupted by a low growl, which seems to be from Konoha's stomach.

"... You were hungry all along?" Hibiya asked, feeling more guilty as Konoha gave a nod.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" Hibiya questioned further, and decided to stand up. But the stinging pain on his butt acted up, which made him collapse to the floor again.

"Hibiya, are you okay?" Konoha said with a barely noticeable worry and shock in his voice. While picking Hibiya up "bridal style", Hibiya wrapped his arms tightly around Konoha's neck.

"…"

"Hibiya?"

"… my butt hurts..." Hibiya mumbled with a flushed expression, then leaned in to Konoha's embrace to cover his face and hugged tightly, "... Lets just go to the kitchen, and get some food..."

Konoha's eyes gleamed when he heard about food. Said a "yes" and then went to the kitchen really quickly.

"I'll cook you something, but you'll have to hold onto me since I can't really stand or walk now! You got it?!" Hibiya commanded while he's still feeling his heart beat really quickly.

The way Konoha nodded and gave a soft "mm" as a sign of agreement made Hibiya heart rate faster.

_Well, our little shota princess likes the attention he's getting from Konoha, eh?_

He really put effort to this lunch, with 2 dozen plates of negimas and triceratops themed cookies. He really likes Konoha after all.

Konoha's eyes are obviously gleamed with even more excitement than ever, even if he had seen the process of making them, he just can't seem to get enough of the Hibiya's lov- I mean Hibiya's cooking.

"It's delicious," he stated after a piece of both the cookies and negimas. From his expressionless face, you could actually see a massive smile on his face, with tints of pink on his cheeks.

Hibiya, who is sitting on Konoha's lap, felt his heart race even faster. While trying to eat as well, he felt like he was about to faint because of Konoha's compliment and how loveable Konoha is.

A while later, with all the plates empty, Hibiya washed the dishes while Konoha's carrying him (since his butt still hurts), and return to their games straight after. Though Hibiya had to rely on Konoha for the rest of the day since, you know, butt pain.

It was a pretty smooth day otherwise, though Hibiya finds it extremely embarrassing that he had to ask Konoha to help him shower and stuff.

* * *

**-Omake-**

June 1st. Another regular day where Hibiya will go to the Dan's hideout with Konoha for something more interesting than playing video games.

Though just when their were about to leave, they found a letter in their letterbox :

_"Dear Hibiya-kun, Konoha-kun,_

_Though we are so close, yet so far. I know everything about the both of you, **everything**, oh yes I do._

_I'm not writing you this to threaten you, or to tell you how creepy I am. But I will not bother you two anymore if you could say "Happy Birthday, Sal-san!" For my very manly and dudely friend. _

_Sincerely,_

_KeiTanaka."_

Both Hibiya and Konoha stared at the letter blankly, and then at each other.

Without hesitation, Hibiya scruntched up the piece of paper and threw it away.

_**Huwaaaat are you doing, princess?!**_

"Uwah!" Hibiya hold his head in fright as the voice resounded in his head. While Konoha merely just looked up a little.

_I politely sent you a letter for a small favour that meant a lot to me, and what do you do? **Threw it away without a second thought?!** _

"Ohhh, so you're the creep that sent that letter!" Showing how pissed he is, Hibiya folded his arms. "Who would do such a stupid request from a random stranger anyway?!"

_Well, I'm sorry, princess! But what bad can it do from doing a birthday shout-out?! _

"Pr-! PRINCESS?!" Flushed Hibiya. "What-!"

_Also! I have blackmail materials to post everywhere, if you don't do it!_

"Huh? What 'blackmail materials'?" Suddenly concerned, Hibiya dropped his arms to his side. To answer his question, an eerie photo fluttered before their eyes. Hibiya caught it quickly before it dropped to the floor. "This-! This is-!"

It's a picture of Konoha biting Hibiya's butt the other day.

"Why am I biting Hibiya's butt?" Konoha stared at the photo, not understanding what's going on right now.

"H-... How did you get this!?" Hibiya ripped the photo and threw it in the bin. His face red as a tomato.

_Ha! I still have more of those from where that came from! Now if you don't do the shout out, Imma put them onli-_

"OKAY! OKAY! I'LL DO WHATEVER YOU SAY! JUST DON'T UPLOAD THEM ANYWHERE!"

_Goodies! You two are so kind! :) Now let's say "Happy Birthday" together in the count of three! _

_One, two...!_

_**Happy Birthday, Sal!**  
_

* * *

A/N: ay I haven't written stories in so long... my skillz level have dropped down to half of what it was a year ago! D: I'm sorry meh writing so bad!

I've planned this fanfic, like, 6 months ago, but SCHOOL! WAI YOU DO DIS TO ME! (TT-TT)

This fanfic is dedicated to Sal-san, not only that he's an awesomely, dudely friend (and me being the worst friend ever since I haven't reply his PMs for so long orz), he even wrote me a Birthday fanfic, a beautiful one at that! I really can't top it, especially with this half-arse fanfic... oh, and he wrote such beautiful things about me (See! he's way too kind to me, I too speechless about everything about him, he's just... DUDE)! How do I repay his kindness! (Q_Q)

I hope I got his birthday right... (I remembered it as June 1st, I hope it's right. PLEASE FORGIVE ME, SAL, IF IT'S WRONG *cries in da corner*) I drew that cover image of KonoHibi to compensate everything. Yup. Imma link the full image if you want... coz... yeah... I'm really good at expressing myself, aren't I *sarcasm as I laugh awkwardly...*

ALL HAIL DUDEMAZING SAL!

Anyways...

I know a lot of people like my ShinKano/KanoShin. I think that arse-grabbing did the job lol Arse-grabbing ftw omfgdidIjustwritethat.

I hope you readers enjoy watching me suffer as I tried to write humour (I can tell you guys are psychics!) SO I hope I could entertain you guys further! Until next time, good bye!

* * *

Now a special message to Sal:

Sal, you are a wonderful person! The coolest, sweetest, dudeliest and kindest dude I've ever met! You're just as important to me as I am to you, litterally Best-Friends-Forever man ;D that's right, FOREVER! YOU'RE NEVER LEAVING ME! MWUHAHAHA (I think I'm a little drunk)!

But craziness aside! You're a charming boy/man/dude whateverANYWAYS! You're amazing and wonderful and there's really no words to define how amazing and dudeful you are! So you shouldn't be so pessimistic! I'm so alike to you in that aspect, and I really brings me down to see how negative you see yourself!

I'm just horrible, I understand why people would hate me. But you?! No way, nu-uh! Never! You're too dude (dude-words are on the top of positive adjective list! That's right! And even that isn't sufficient to be on par with you!) and If anyone say anything mean to you like they mean, I'll hunt that person down and down-right slap their head off! (okay, I don't actually have the courage for that, but I would if I could!) I could never hate you, you're too... [insert dude-word]

Okay, I'm just rambling here... so basically. Sal. You amazing. Too dude. BFFs :D. Always be positive because me and your family and friends and fans and whoever else you'll meet, we love you for who you are! *lots of dudehugs and dudelove* don't you ever say anything about yourself! Because we'll be here to proof you wrong! (I don't know why I'm saying it for everyone else, I hope they don't mind *shifty eyes*.)

Omg I'm sorry, I hope I didn't... ahhhhh okay, I'll stop rambling! GJ, GL and keep it up Sal!

*Dudefist*


End file.
